TORWars Intelligence Report: Arrr, Matey!

Welcome to the TORWars Intelligence Report! The following information has been datamined from recent Star Wars: The Old Republic patches. This time we are going to look at some upcoming additions to the Cartel Market.

Intelligence like this is not always accurate, the information contained within this report may or may not occur. It may be seen in the game as is, altered or not at all. The following text will likely contain SPOILERS, so read at your own risk.

 

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…Incoming Transmission….

…Secure Line Established….

…Decrypting Using Cipher Alpha Overlord….

Attention: Watcher 11

Source: Cipher Agent Werit

Begin Imperial Intelligence report

Watcher 11, Werit reporting in. I apologize for the lateness of this report. It took longer than expected to find a suitable cover. I have assumed the role of a stock boy in the Cartel Market. Oddly enough, this was the only position I was qualified for, and I still had to bribe the manager. After receiving my Cartel Market monogrammed apron, I set out to complete my mission.

One of my first discoveries also happens to be one of the more alarming. The Cartel is currently working on releasing the Space Pirate Pack. We’ve long suspected that the Cartel has been in bed with pirates, but now we have solid proof. I have been unable to ascertain what this pack contains, as my stock boy credentials only get me access to the snack room. However, from what I have heard at the water-cooler, they will be releasing the new pack soon.

Another surprising discovery I made while stocking the snack room was a replica Imperial Frigate toy. It is modeled after your experimental Frigate XF-32A. I don’t know how the Cartel got their hands on the plans, but they decided to make a toy out of it! Soon children across the galaxy will be playing with the height of Imperial technology! I recommend an audit of the Imperial Navy to find the leak as soon as possible.

I managed to sneak into the Cartel Armor Division, where I saw two new armor sets under construction. The first, Sanctified Caretaker, looks to be marketed toward Jedi Consulars. The second armor set was called Malevolent Interrogator and seems to be a Sith Inquisitor armor set. I could not get eyes on them though, as they were under heavy guard.

This last piece of intelligence was obtained while deep under cover and at great risk to myself. Ok, that’s not quite accurate. I was in the lavatory and overheard some executives talking about a new product. What grabbed my attention was one of them mentioned the introduction of a new vehicle to the Cartel Market. He just said it was called the Firebolt Mount and it was going to be spectacular. Sadly, I was not able to discern any more details due to a rather loud Rattataki in the next stall over.

I hope Imperial Intelligence found this information useful, as it has been one of my most difficult assignments. I would report on some more of findings, but my boss is really on me about restocking the Hutt-brand Baby Food, you know, the one with the little slug in a diaper on the wrapper? They all have to be lined up nice and straight, otherwise I’ll be in a heap of trouble.

End Imperial Intelligence report

Connection Terminating…

Deleting Files….

Shutting down…

If you want to dig into some of the raw data for this post, you can do it on Werit’s site here and here.


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9 Responses to “TORWars Intelligence Report: Arrr, Matey!”

  1. Knighthammer says:

    Ok, hard to read this and not laugh, at least for me. Good Job!

  2. AbnerDoon says:

    Darn I was really hoping it was going to be the bounty hunter armor out next.

  3. bk says:

    I’m pretty sure the Firebolt Mount is a broom stick from Harry Potter.

  4. Werit says:

    There is still a chance it could be :) These are not always accurate, so keep the faith!

  5. MajorYutz says:

    Enjoyed the read!

  6. Werit says:

    So, I think the Firebolt Mount is the new Incendia Speeder released today. They both are fire-like names.

  7. [...] ● Werit, is the fine creator of the TORWars Dev Watch and the TORWars Intelligence Report [...]

  8. Alberto says:

    Your method of telling all in this piece of writing is actually pleasant, every one be able to
    simply understand it, Thanks a lot.

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